Listen to Friends Don’t Let Friends

This is a totally jokey novelty song. Fun to write, fun to sing, and pretty darned juvenile.

More than you need to know: I’ve never sung karaoke. But when I finally do, it will be Bob Seger’s 1973 power ballad “Turn the Page.”

Friends Don’t Let Friends

© 2010 Bryan Masters

I knew it would happen
  saw it coming from miles away

  figured I couldn't stop you
  so I just got out of your way

  your courage was up
  you'd had a few and ha a few more

  I knew it was over

  by the look in your eye
  as you stood up and walked cross the floor
Guess I shoulda done something, but I didn't
   and now the blame is on me
   'cause karaoke kills
   and friends don't let friends karaoke

In the spotlight you stood
   microphone in your right hand
   striking a pose
   part Cher and part Duran Duran
   and those cocktails you drank
   emboldened you to carry on
   with your stunning performance
   of what the hell were you thinking
   channeling Celine Dion
if it hadn't a been for the whiskey
   you'd probably have less to regret
   if it hadn't a been for the YouTube
   you'd eventually be able to forget
For the record, karaoke
   isn't evil all by itself
   like whiskey isn't evil
   sitting quiet in a bottle on the shelf
   whiskey and karaoke
   are well-behaved citizens
   but may the lord help you
   when those two get together
   for a night out with you and your friends

Bryan Masters Music/ASCAP